Jelani do

Now this post I wrote today and published today, so when I say yesterday I actually mean yesterday. Today refers to today. Although tomorrow doesn't come up in this post, I will clarify that tomorrow actually refers to two days from now. Dig?

My roommate Jelani is a 50 something Afghani man who, while I’m sure he means well, is starting to get on my nerves a bit. It’s not his fault really. I know he’s just trying to be friendly and he honestly is a nice guy, I just don’t want to chit chat with him about ping pong or chess, it just doesn’t interest me. If I’m lying on my bed reading, it means I don’t really want to have a conversation. I’m reading.

Anyways, he was telling me that until last week he was bunking with someone in another room but when this room became empty he asked to move because his roommate snored. Well guess what I discovered last night between 3 and 4am, Jelani snores too. I kept yelling at him to wake him up and he would stop for a minute or so and then carry on.

On top of that, Jelani has an alarm clock that he obviously doesn’t know how to use. On my first night here it went off at exactly 5:12am. It would beep for a minute or so and then stop for 3 or 4 minutes and then repeat. I let it go for about 20 minutes thinking that it would eventually wake him up and he would fix it. After that didn't work I would yell at him a bit to see if I could wake him up so he could fix it. I’ll tell you one thing, that the guy is a deep sleeper. When he did eventually wake up I asked him if he could shut off his alarm, he fumbled around a bit and then got up to go to the washroom. I closed my eyes to go back to sleep for a bit and then I could hear the alarm again, but muffled. Turns out he doesn’t know how to work the thing so he just put it under his pillow to make it quiet. When he came back to the room I asked him again to turn it off and so he showed me the alarm clock. I poked around at it and shut off the alarm. That’s when the rocket attack came. No more sleep for Nick that night.

Well last night after Jelani finally stopped snoring around 4am I got back to sleep only to be woken up again at exactly 5:12am by the fucking alarm clock! At this point I was not interested in going through the same conversation as I had the night before so I just put in my iPod and managed to sleep a little longer before having to get up to go to work.

Now that I think about it, I’m not actually sure that I am jet lagged… I'm Jelani lagged.